His Yes, Your No

"I said yes to your number and yes to you dating me
Yes we can be together but you gotta wait for me
The first time I said no
It's like I never said yes (like I never said yes)
I said yes we can be together, yes you can stay with me
but when I say no not tonight you actin so ungratefully
The first time I said no it's like I never said yes"

Has this ever happened to you? You're dating a guy...you give him your number, you let him call you and take you out, but when you say NO to having sex with him he starts to trip. Did you give into his shameless plea or did you stand firm with your no?

Some guys have a lot of nerve! They think that just because they text back and forth with you or take you out on a date that they're ENTITLED to sleep with you. Really? Two months of simpy messages and a happy meal dinner should never lead to getting the goodies! They're crazy to think that a couple of yeses will lead to the big yes...and like Beyonce said "You must not know about me!"

Check out what happens in the song when her dude tries to pressure her into having sex.

"You was at my house
I was sitting on my couch
You was really buggin so I told you to get out
I had been misjudging you
You had a lot of nerve
You to damn old to be so immature I hope you learn
You said I move to slow
I showed you to the door
You said you'd call me later
I said don't call no more
It is cool if you can't wait for me
Im glad you let me know
Cause you showed me your true face baby the first time i said no"

Don't feel afraid to walk a guy to the door of your life if he is pressuring you to do something that you don't want to do. Just because you've said yes to some things doesn't mean that you should feel obligated to say yes to everything. You should never have to lower your standards to keep a guy. Of course the guy is going to say things to make you doubt yourself like:

• "If you loved/cared about me...
• I think you're special
• If you don't, there are plenty of girls who will
• We like each other a lot, right?
  

Stay strong ladies! This is all apart of his game. Guys will say anything to make you feel bad. But, don't let him guilt you into having sex. You are special and beautiful, but not for his reasons. The right guy will respect your morals and wait for you. The right guy will never pressure you to anything you don't want to do. "Hangin' out" with someone is never grounds for having sex. Oh and just because two people like each other a lot is not a good reason to sleep with each other either. You should be able to date someone without any strings being attached.

When a guy shows his true colors, don't hesitate to chuck up the deuces. If Chris Brown and his boys can, then so can you...lol. Besides, don't you want a guy who likes you for you and not just your body? So, if you're in a situation where a guy starts to huff and puff because he isn't getting his way, let your values support your no and keep it rollin' to the next one. The right guy won't be threatened by your no and appreciate your yeses ;)



-- Tymika Morrison
Brownstone Team